Meaningless Drivel

Oh where have I been? I have been and seen, felt a bit green, and then back again. What a time it’s been…what a time…

Wandering the ever-lovin’ parts of Eastern Alberta, I have traveled down some roads I’ve never gone down before. Mostly, I got lost on roads I’ve never traveled down before, but sometimes it was because I was driving in the dark and my sense of direction goes all kind of wrong. Thankfully, I’ve had a full tank of gas in those moments. Yes, Dad, I heard what you said to me this winter. Daughters do listen to their Daddies once in a while, you know!

My tea business has taken off to places I didn’t know I’d actually see. I achieved all the Success Start goals with Steeped Tea except the last wee bit that involved a diamond ring. That’s ok though. I was so excited to have actually hit the goals that I did make. Wow!! I didn’t even feel like I worked as hard as I should have. I did work hard, though…no doubt about that.

In fact, when I signed up, I think we all just thought it was a little fad and that I could jump off of the tea train with no harm done. Well, I couldn’t jump when it was going so fast, now, could I? My whole family has adjusted to the changes that having a working (inside and outside of the home) mom involves. I love, LOVE that I can do a lot of my work from the home and I involve my whole family in it. My daughter was organizing my sniffer jars (tea for customers to smell) tonight and she was such a big help! She loved it too. It’s not often that she feels like she can enjoy something I ask her to do.

Not only have I been selling tea like crazy, but we’ve had other “life” stuff happen that has been really hard and has taken a bit of emotional and brain space. I am thankful to say that I am at peace because the One who gives me Life has it all under control and I trust Him. I am blessed to be married to one of the world’s most wonderful men and we’ve held onto each other during this rocky time. Regardless, we have waded through deep waters and we’ll continue to trust in the our Lord through it all.

I have been so desperate to write my book but it seems that time has been ever-so-elusive and I have hardly written a word since January. It seems that everything just happened at the same time and writing has taken a back seat. I used to think I couldn’t go through a day without writing something to help me get through the crazy days of early childhood parenting. Oh, those were the days!! I had so many zany stories back then. I still have an odd good one now and again, but I don’t get down to write it until it’s completely out of my memory. Then what is the point of writing meaningless drivel. Hmmm…?

It seems July will be a slower month, with my man taking some holidays and the Tea business taking a serious turn. It’s summer and I think it’s like that for many businesses. I almost don’t know how to turn off my tea brain though. June was hectic and amazing! My brain goes between tea facts to the “ear worms”, thanks to Disney’s last couple of movies, which are driving us all insane. Whenever someone (aka. ME) says “Awesome”, the tune “Everything is Awesome” goes screaming through my head. I think I will obliterate that word from the dictionary one of these days.

I have a funny story to tell but I’ll save it for my other blog…

It seems we are moving into the phase where the saying “Eating me out of house and home” becomes a glaring reality and not just a clever turn of phrase. We have seen our oldest slam right into puberty and through an alarming rate of shoe sizes. I can’t keep the guy in pants. From the toddler who would hardly eat a thing to a kid who can’t keep his belly full. Oatmeal is the food of choice. Who knew? Our youngest has never had a lull in her growth rate and has always been hungry so it’s nothing new to have her say “I’m STARVING” but just today we all noticed that she’s getting a little (not much) rounder. Of course, one of the kids had to point it out, which wasn’t very nice at all. But regardless, I think she’s stalled in the height for the moment, but not for long. I think she’s getting ready to shoot up again. I have started shopping mainly at thrift stores and super sales. How do you keep up when a kid grows out of his shoes a month after getting a new pair? I am getting tips from moms that have been here and done this. I have been so thankful for hand-me-downs!

It’s been a long time since I’ve written and I feel like I haven’t much clever to talk about but my brain does feel duller than a butcher’s knife after a long days’ work so we’ll leave it at that, shall we? Maybe next time I’ll have some clever drivel.

 

 

The lonely road to…somewhere…?

I should have known, when I decided to forgo my usual morning cup o’ joe that the morning was not going to go as expected. I should have taken that morning moment to make the coffee.

I was innocently catching up on messages on Facebook when my kids said with glee “Someone’s here!!”

“Wha…t?”

You’ve never seen a mother run so fast for her pants and a hat to hide the fact that she was completely unprepared for whatever was to come. I was wondering who it was at my door when I opened it and blurted “OH YOU, are HERE? Now?” to a Social Worker. Despite my being incredibly rude first off, she smiled graciously, but with a subtly puzzled look in her eyes that spoke the truth. “The appointment was booked last week…” And sure enough, there it was on my calendar. I apologized profusely and tried to hide the unruly bed hair trying to escape my fancy Jamaica hat. Fancy. Not as fancy as all the dishes from my Steeped Tea party the night before, and all the breakfast dishes all piled precariously looked.  Yah, ok…that fancy.

It is that time of year for my Social Worker to come for a visit to renew our funding contract for our child who has disabilities. Our Aspie.

The kids were deliriously happy that I had been taken unawares and that they were free to do as they please and get away with it for the next hour. Mommy has a meeting….whoo hoo! Let’s be the kids who hide in the basement with a long movie. Happy, healthy kids. And NO Home schooling. Yay!…Mom’s outta our hair.

The appointment went well, except I could feel the morning grit on my teeth and feel the night stank that coated my mouth because brushing my teeth hadn’t fit into my furiously fast apparel change. I figured being in pants was more important than shining my gritty teeth.

As the clock ticked my 11am appointment was quickly approaching. I was so thankful both of those morning appointments were booked to be at my (extremely chaotic) house. If it had to happen this way, it was a good plan…without actually putting two brain cells together to plan it.

Who planned to have two appointments on one morning and then didn’t write stuff down on the calendar? I didn’t. Because I didn’t get that far. If I would just look at my calendar some days. And maybe write the other things down.

With a window only long enough to  brush the grit and grime out of my chops and scrape through my hair only to put a cap back on it. I think I may have washed my face. In a panic I paid my children to sweep and tidy while I wiped and looked for my meeting material. I may have even stacked the dishes at the sink to make it look like they were getting done.

The next professional came through the door and I still pretty much looked like I had been zapped out of some strange sort of fashion faux pas machine. Doesn’t matter, its office wear, where I work!

Home schooling meeting over, I had zero seconds to leap out of the door and get headed to where? I didn’t know. I had to go somewhere that I was completely unfamiliar with, and when I have to navigate unfamiliar territory, I internally freak. With the rush out the door I forgot my cell phone. I did remember to bring a copy of the incredibly unclear directions Google gave me. They were ever so NOT HELPFUL! Thanks Google. You don’t live here…you don’t know how much you have messed with my head trying to give me directions out here. THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE.

I have proof that the middle of nowhere exists because I was there. With bells. Well, tea anyways.

I got lost, first off. Just how do you get lost on the VAST prairies? Easily. Done it more times than I’ll ever tell you. Wasted 20 min’s of driving time and I had to be at the school, in an hour. Google told me it would take 1.5 hours.  I was delivering teas for a fundraiser the school had run and it had been “challenging” from the start. I was happy to get it over with, if only Google was correct, once in a while. C’mon. At least this time!

Driving to the “remote” community required a long road in the middle of somewhere. It is rumored to be a dangerous highway and with a few good reasons. I’ve always felt safe when I’ve been stranded on the prairies with no cell phone. I knew a friendly farmer would stop and help. Don’t ask how many times that’s been…I don’t have those same fuzzy prairie thoughts in this area. Not in this part of the world. No, you think big scary thoughts. And I forgot my cell. I felt all alone and didn’t know where I was going.

the clouds hung heavy with their load. Heavy and ominous. The air seemed in turmoil as it blew me around the road in the van. Do you ever feel like when you are trying to find a place you’ve never been that it seems to take FOREVER? And I felt alone. Really alone.  There were hardly any signs at all telling me that I was going the right direction so I was hoping I had taken the correct long winding road to somewhere. Otherwise, I was hooped.

An hour and a half drive later I finally found the town I was looking for! I even found the school, which was so easy to find, that I missed it the first time.  Darn that Google!! Beautiful town!

With the packages delivered it was a load off my mind and I went straight for the closest vendor of caffeine. I felt the energy return and I do believe the sun peeked out of the clouds.

On my way home that lonely road became a little busier. At the “scary” part in the highway I suddenly was caught behind a very slow-moving truck. A fast-moving truck moved quickly to box me in. I got very nervous at this point. We started slowing down and another vehicle joined the line moving slowly. all of a sudden, the truck behind me, that had almost been kissing my bumper, pulled out and with a hair to spare the oncoming truck he zoomed in front. I could see a head on collision that was seemingly going to happen but thankfully didn’t. I wasn’t boxed in any more, but as I passed through the only four-way stop on the whole road, I found myself boxed in again. Thankfully, it was only harmless paranoia on my part.

The rest of the trip I enjoyed just how amazing God had made this part of the country in Spring. It’s quite beautiful really.

I got home and kids flew in all directions. Some to soccer, some making their own supper and some had flown the coop with others a while before. I was glad to kiss my hubby and know this day may actually come to a peaceful end.

I was reminded, on that lonely road, that even though I was the only one in the van, I had a friend and protector right with me no matter what happened. I am so thankful my Jesus, my Savior and my friend saw me safe. Even if I hadn’t been safe, He would have been with me. 1960095_10151932139966190_238625747_n

 

 

Finding the words

I haven’t written much lately. You may have noticed. I’ve had trouble finding words. That’s not normal for me.

While I am super stoked that I made it through the winter and pretty much accomplished my goal of not complaining about the weather ALL WINTER. Woo hoo! I never promised a Spring complaint fast…but I’ve been doing well. Caught myself once or twice. But seriously, it doesn’t help to complain so I swallowed it. You know what? I think it made it feel like the cold weather passed more quickly. Also, I didn’t look at the tropical pictures people like to torture others with. That helped too. I especially am NOT Looking at them this week. It helps me not complain :) Of course I had to torture others last year when we went to Jamaica, so all is fair in love and holidays.

While this winter was, by a thousand miles, better than last winter it was another kind of painful for us. Last winter (2012-13) was a long and dreadful winter filled with pain and fatigue that I have NEVER experienced the like of before. I spent days, weeks and months begging God to take away my pain and to allow me to get back to “normal”. My normal is a healthy person’s sick day. God has been so amazing in giving me the strength for many years. I wonder, at times, if I went so hard for so long that my body just up and had to have a reboot. I entertained thoughts I had never thought I would let jump around in my head. When your body is that rebellious your head starts to think crazy thoughts.

I am thankful that I had family and friends who put up with the nutty talk and prayed me through it. The Reverend still has a little PTSD from how hard it was for him. On my bad days, this winter, he had the look of sheer terror in his eyes. I know that he was a super hero and got this family through some of the most difficult times we’ve faced. On those days he wondered if this time it (my inability to deal with life) was back again. I’m thankful to say that, for the most part, those days lasted only a few days at most. It was never as intense as it was before.

This winter was different. Oh man, how thankful I am for that! I can truly say that God has allowed me to see a bit of the normalcy back, though I am far from what I used to be, even still. I think part of it is that he worked on my heart so much that I just am NOT the same as I used to be. None of us are. The “Bad Winter” was a changing time for me spiritually, physically and mentally. I cut out food that was making my body more stressed than it had to be. I started running (OH MY WHAT A MIRACLE!!). I had friends urge me to think outside of my spiritual box that I had put God in. God worked through it all. Wow!

I am healthier in so many ways.

But…then there is a different sort of pain.

The pain that people in ministry are not supposed to talk of. The type other people cause.

I had a feeling that something was coming. Call my weird but it’s true.

The church we are in has been so amazing and so full of grace for us as a family. We were growing, thriving, excited. I felt like we were on the cusp of something amazing for our little community. I still do. I think God is up to something. But that makes Satan (and yes, I think he’s working hard) upset. When the people of God are on fire and full of purpose there is sure to be backlash. He doesn’t want people to be victorious. He doesn’t want people to be SAVED. He doesn’t like people to feel the love of the Father for his created.

And there has been backlash.

And that’s all I can say. It’s been tough in ways I can’t speak of.

I know that the battle is NOT lost. I know that there are incredible things happening in people’s’ hearts around this place. If the battle is this fierce, then it must be something crazy good. I see the seedlings of something.

Just wait. It’s going to happen!

 

 

Rubber boots filled with snow

If anyone had been privy to the scene the other day, they may have taken my name down and called someone to intervene. It was hilarious but I couldn’t  laugh at the moment, I was too busy.

You see, spring is just around a few corners. Oh, we have had above freezing temperatures, but I’m not fooled. I know this wonderful weather will come and go and when it goes usually there is a snowstorm in it for us.  It’s been LOVELY! In fact, my kids have gotten along so well, with all the outdoor air in their bodies, that I’ve had to check to see if they are still really my kids and not aliens that have taken over their personalities. I have enjoyed and relished this week of spring in the air. The sunshine, the smiles, the trampoline antics…well, maybe not the antics because they give me such a horrifying vision of possible injuries. The kids forget every year how their poor bodies have atrophied over winter. Not really, but their core strength is not what it was when they last jumped with wild abandon and the tricks they try are scary to watch. I give the usual “Don’t do that anymore, you are going to end up in the hospital or worse!” routine. They look my way to placate me but I know they are ignoring me so I walk away and pretend they obeying every word.

Since they could walk, the melting of snow, even if only slightly above freezing, indicated that they should throw most of their clothing to the wind and free their feet of cumbersome boots. Of course, they come back inside crying over how cold they are but only after rolling about in the puddles for a few icy minutes.

The other day, with the snow melt-y but not yet melted, they tramped outside in their newly found rubber boots. Every year (shaking head in wonder) they think that the rubber boots will somehow make them impervious to the frigid water of the enormous puddles that abound.

Every year, it’s a lesson learned the fun way. This year, I smiled as I whisked them outside without jackets but wearing their trusty (and maybe a smidge too small) boots on. I’m a good mom, really. They aren’t in shorts yet (I’ve hidden them) so that’s something! Not five minutes later a shrill but long screech could be heard rounding the corner and pounding up the deck steps. I usually let the kids come and tell me what’s what when someone’s crying (unless they can’t move to come and tell me) but the sound was so desperate I figured I should really go to the door and ask. There, my youngest was yelling “COLD!COLD!HELP!THE SNOW…I CAN’T GET THEM OFF!!!!!” A little confused I wondered about what she was screaming about. She rushed inside and as she passed me I could see her boots were plum FULL of heavy packed snow. Oh, now that would burn!

I took her quickly back outside and thought it a quick task to dispense of. Those rubber boots were PACKED, simply packed to the top and apparently the boots didn’t fit as well as she said they did. She sat on the deck as I pulled and pulled and she screamed at the very top of her lungs as though she were dying. I put my foot on her tummy (and not very hard but to give me a little leverage) and pulled some more. She was frantic and as the pulling continued I started feeling for my poor little girl. My pulls got a little more enthusiastic but I wanted to be sure not to pull too hard either. I was considering dousing her in cooking oil but with her screaming freaky murder I just kept hoping the suction on the boots would miraculously give way to freedom. I smiled a bit as I realized what it must look like. Me with my foot on her tummy and pulling with all my might at her foot, all the while she was screaming like the end of the world was upon us.

The boot did pop off eventually and then we had to face the other boot.

At long last, we freed both her reddened feet and scooted inside for a pair of warm socks and a blanket. All was well in her world again and I sighed with relief.

I asked her if she needed a bigger pair of boots perhaps? She replied that she did. Not sure if it would have helped her with the boots slammed tight with all that snow but maybe? It couldn’t have hurt, that’s for sure.

For future reference I told her that maybe she should wait until the snow is a little more melted (and a warmer day) before she tries the puddles again. She did not disagree but snuggled in closer for a little warmth.

All is well that ends well.

March Madness!!

All winter I’ve been waiting for this month! The month where everyone complains about the Canadian Prairie weather and I will be tested in my resolve to stay positive for the first March since, well, probably since I moved to the wide open prairies. I promised myself and God that I would not complain about the weather. I was very specific about that. I didn’t say I wouldn’t complain at all :) but about the weather? Nada negative word would cross these lips. I think I’ve almost done it too.

You see, right here where I live, March is NOT spring, almost never. Winter drags on longer here than a rash on a baby’s bottom. Oh sure, we get tricked into thinking that the snow will be gone soon by the weather forecasters promising a week of above zero temperatures. It makes us all a little loonie. We have a few days of melting, then kabam! it’s the Blizzard of the Century and temperatures at record-setting lows for the first time in history.1960095_10151932139966190_238625747_n

I’ve caught on to the prairie winter weather thing now. It’s only taken me two decades. I’m not fooled this year! And that’s why I’m so darned positive. I moved here willingly, along with my man, and here we are going to stay for as long as the Lord sees fit. I keep trying to convince Him that we are supposed to move to Mexico, or Jamaica or Hawaii but so far it’s a no go. In fact, I’ve met some people from other HOT and tropical lands who chose to live HERE and they are NOT complaining about the weather. If someone who grew up in the tropics or desert can handle these harsh winters then certainly a born and raised Canadian can too! This is a fabulous country and I chose to live here. I am dealing with it! Life is good here too. I have a warm house, a loving family, a peaceful country and friends that make life wonderful.

I won’t complain about the weather. It’s been sunny and cold and I am not down about it. It’s SUNNY!! Yipee!

But the ups and downs in weather have my body in a cranky mood. My spirit is light and happy but my body is in a very dark place. The ups and downs in barometric pressure as the cold and warm fronts make their way into and out of our lives test me. Oh my do they test me. That’s why I promised not to promise about never complaining about my body and it’s cranky old ways.

It goes to show you, fibromyalgia is NOT all in the mind because, besides the hormonal mood swings of peri-menopause, my mind is GOOD. I feel great about getting through winter with God’s strength and positive outlook. I know that determining to not dwell on the negative and instead dwell on the positive my outlook about winter has been awesome. I get those long johns on those cold days and I wrap myself up so I don’t feel the cold as badly.

You see? It was in March that I married the man I still love passionately, the month that I welcomed two of my babies home, the month that other dear family members have birthdays in. Easter is sometimes in March, though, not this year. It’s a time of getting through the last of the challenge of winter and moving onto the hope of spring (sometimes) and it’s just a good, all around month.

It’s MARCH!! Yipee Skippy! I’ve made it through most of the winter and soon it will be spring. Even if it last through record-breaking months or weeks. Last year was the longest one ever so chances are spring IS just around the corner.

I am not going to wish I was somewhere else this last bit of winter! I will be thankful for a WARM house and HOT water. I am incredibly thankful for the way God has provided for us so that we can have a great March! We get to have 2 birthdays, an anniversary, another big 50th anniversary celebration (my in-laws!!) and many other special times this March.

It’s ok if March came in like a lion. It’s ok if it doesn’t go out like a lamb! It’s going to be spring SOMEDAY and that someday is closer than it was last month.

The only March Madness I will feel will be the birthday party and anniversary celebration prep and all it’s insanity. But even then, we are celebrating people we love and I am thankful for them.

I love March!

I said I’d never…

And I should know better by now!

I’ve actually said “NEVER!!” a few times in my life and have pretty much always ended up eating my words.

The first “never” I can remember saying is “I will never weigh more than____ lbs”, thinking I’d escape my long line of voluptuous genetics, as a teenager. What did I know? I was wrong. Quite drastically wrong.

Another “never” I remember saying is I will never run a race unless it’s away from a dangerous mountain lion or bear of some sort. I knew that should those scenarios happen, I would be dead meat. Then last summer I ran, in a race. I didn’t do well, mind you, but I ran the 5km. I also didn’t die!!

As I write this post, I am doing another “never” I told myself for many years. I am writing for fun. For FUN!! Landsakes a livin’! What’s going on here? I guess you can change, even if you are in midlife. I’m even attempting to write a book and have several other ideas in mind for writing projects. If I could carve out the time to put my fingers and brain into it I’d have it done by now.

Now here I go and start another “never” I swore I’d never do.

No offence to any independent sales consultants or owners of direct marketing businesses…but I said I’d never do it. While I’ve rocked it out in the retail world, especially if I liked the product, I never wanted to come across as pressuring family or friends to buy something or join an organization just because they knew me. The very nature of this business is connecting first with family and friends. That’s how most everyone gets their start. Being in the ministry also makes this situation a little more awkward. We are in the business of marketing Jesus. Well, you know what I mean. I found that people who were trying to sell me these type of direct marketing-type businesses were pretty much always more enthusiastic about their product/organization then they were their relationship with Jesus. I never want it to seem that I love anything more than I love Jesus. I don’t want to be more enthusiastic about anything than I am about what Jesus has done for us and the love that he has for us. Never.

There. There’s a never I’m going to stick with. If I ever break that one, you are free to tell me and smack me upside the head.

This product and company is different from others that I’ve been introduced to. It’s different because I like it, it’s affordable and it’s a pretty sweet deal as far as investment vs. risk. While I know I will invest more time than money in the beginning, what I paid for the starter package was fully worth it in product that I received. If I happen to not be able to do it for health or whatever reason, I have more than made up for it in product received.

What is it? It’s tea. Steeped Tea. As simple as that. I tried the tea and liked it very much. I attended a few tea parties that were fun and the tea was terrific. I enjoyed it so much that I asked my consultant friend if I could be a consultant too. She tried not to dance in glee but I could tell she was excited.

Just to be totally honest, I wanted the tea at the consultant’s price. Word. I am cheap. Turns out that the company is so amazing that I can’t help but try to sell it. I don’t want to pressure people into buying, ever. But the tea is so good it will sell itself. The company has such high standards and has even been featured on Dragon’s Den. Two of the “Dragons” were so excited about the company that they immediately made offers.

Anyways, here I am selling tea. And I LOVE it. Not as much as Jesus or my family…but I do like it very much. I had my first party last night. Well, it wasn’t my first. I had a training party where my consultant and friend showed me how to do it. Last night was fun even if I forgot most of what I was going to say.

Never say never. I have eaten my words so many times. Have you ever said never then realized you had to change your mind about it? Most of the time it’s a good thing. A growing thing. In my case, it’s a tea thing.

PS. If you want to know how to get the tea and do it through me, then let me know. I will give you my info in a private message.

Be real

Perfection.

I never set out to achieve this illusive idea. Back in the day, when I was growing up, I didn’t feel pressure to be perfect. In fact, as a middle child, I saw that perfection was an impossible task. So, when I became the wife of a hopeful pastor-to-be, I knew I was supposed to shine the light of Christ to those around me (as all people who have a relationship with Jesus should) but I knew I would never be perfect until the other side of life.

Fast forward a couple of decades, and somehow I’ve lost the ability to see reason, where perfection is concerned. As the internet became a full blown lifestyle for the entire world, and perfect images and writing seemed almost commonplace, I stood out as an all-too-imperfect specimen. While I had been comfortable in my seeming mediocrity, I was no longer content to be so.

Since beginning my venture into blogging/writing, I have received flack from the most surprising of places. People that I thought were fairly supportive began seeing me for who I truly was. I was being, what I thought, was real. Apparently, my real is hard to swallow. Somehow, I was supposed to have risen above what life dealt and not be human. Then, with the perusal of other people’s lives, I began to think there was something awfully wrong with being real.

Don’t get me wrong. I get what they were trying to say. They were trying to point out to me that maybe I wasn’t at the place I was supposed to be. I was over-sharing. I should be an example, a beacon. I shouldn’t still be struggling with very human issues. Sinful issues. I shouldn’t be that immature. You know what? They were a little right.

“I don’t really understand myself, for I want to do what is right, but I don’t do it. Instead, I do what I hate.” (Rom. 7:15 NLT – the apostle Paul speaking)

And wrong.

If Paul, who wrote many of the books in the New Testament struggled, maybe it isn’t so unusual for a mature believer to struggle…

So, with people telling me that it wasn’t really very mature of me to share my struggles and that I should be in a different place PLUS the rest of the “world” pushing the illusion of perfection, I stopped wanting to be real.

Except that there is one thing about being real. Being real makes you relatable.

While drawing closer to God does change you and putting his Word in your memory and heart does make the temptation and lure of the world less appealing, there is going to be a struggle until we die. We are ALL at different places in our spiritual walk. Some of us are far away, some of us are long into our journey and have come a long way.

The good news is that there is grace for ALL.

For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith–and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God–  not by works, so that no one can boast.”Eph.2:8-9
We don’t have to work for it. We don’t have to be perfect. We can be real. I just love this next part…
“Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.” Eph. 3:17-19 NLT
When Christ is in our lives and we understand what he did for us, we will understand more and more what that actually means – we will understand the LOVE he has for us more deeply. That understanding changes the very essence of us. The struggle with the sinful things of this world and our humanity still is raging but we become less attached to the things that look tempting and more attached to the God who loves us so very much.
It gives me shivers, actually.
I am being made complete.
Does that mean that life suddenly got easier? No way. My life is freaking hard sometimes, my friends. I am going to be real about that. I will continue to write about the battle because the battle is raging for our hearts and souls.
We know how it all turns out though, and I’ve got to tell you, I am looking forward to the day where Jesus will make it all right again in the end.
Until that time, I’m living on grace, not perfection.